Unnecessary Inches


Recently a man came into my store and was asking for all sorts of products.  Unfortunately we didn’t have anything he was looking for so he had stated he would just have to go to Home Depot for them…(50 Shades much?)  Then he tells me the size of a cock ring he is looking for, 2″ and 1/4.  We did not have that in stock either, no strike that, we Never have any in that size!

He then says, “I know I’m larger than the average male, it’s so hard finding the right size.”  My first thought was wow good for you buddy!  Then my second thought was, why does he feel the need to “brag” about his hmmm thickness I should say.  My third thought was, why is he even sharing details like this with a stranger.  Is it because he is “bragging” or is he really that large.  Then I had another thought, if this man is the size he claims to be then I feel sorry for the woman who is performing oral on him, (her jaw must be hurting by the end!)

I confess, I measured my mouth when it was wide open and it is 1″ and 3/4, which would mean “Mr Horsecock” would not even be suitable for me!  Maybe I have a small mouth.  I would ask other women how wide their mouth opens to, but I’m pretty sure I would get a look like “what the fuck is wrong with her!”

Which brings me to my next topic.  Why do women want men with large penises?  It’s a known fact that the vaginal depth is 4-6 inches.  As a woman becomes more aroused, she can expand maybe up to another two inches.  So if you’re looking for men to be 10″ or bigger what in the world are you going to do with all of those unnecessary inches?  Is it just to be able to claim that your man is extremely large?  Because it’s a fact that there is no way you’re fitting a whole 10 incher inside you vaginally.

Finally, women should never judge a man based on size.  You can get plenty of pleasure with what a man has, and if you can not, then you should look into trying different positions and adding toys into the mix.




Questions & comments are always welcomed!

Twitter: @officialJ

The best job ever



“You have the best job ever.” People say this to me all the time. After being here six years I’m not sure why people find it so great.  Well, maybe I should say nothing surprises me about my job.  Be it a product or any questions people ask, nothing embarrasses me.  Yesterday a man easily in his 50s was turning 12 different shades of red asking for a lubricant.  Later on in the day I had a couple, middle aged man and woman, who from the moment they entered the store till the moment they left were talking with me and having a great time asking about toys and such.  You would be surprised how many customers, men and women both, who are too nervous to ask me for what they need.  My job is to help you find the perfect toy, movie, lube, ball gag, lol anything you need or want!  There are several different types of customers that frequent my store.  More than I can even write about in one blog post.  There are people who come in and look so pissed off.  It always makes me wonder how anyone can be mad in a store that’s geared towards pleasure.  Couples are always interesting to see.  Most of the time the woman will give me dirty looks, as if to say, “Don’t look at my man,” or “she must be a slut to work at a store like this.”  And what’s funny is they pay more attention giving me the evil eye to even enjoy being in the shop with their man and finding a product that could make their night amazing.  They will end up leaving with nothing, and the men look disappointed but I’m sure to prevent an argument in public they leave willingly.  Then women wonder why men cheat..well when he was trying to get you to open up sexually, you denied the opportunity because you got angry.  That’s also another topic for another blog.

A word of advice, leave your “embarrassment” at the door.  Clearly there is only one reason why you’re there.  Also, don’t be nervous or shy to ask questions.  If you want to know about a product you’re better off asking instead of making a purchase that in the end might not be the product for you.  Any questions you have, believe me I have heard it all.  It’s sex, it’s fun and healthy.  Don’t make it depressing!! 

50 Shades of Grey

I have finally finished reading the ‘trilogy’ of the Fifty Shades series.  At first I was hesitant to read it.  I listened to a bunch of mixed reviews.  Most people believed it was a porn turned into a novel.  A hardcore ‘Harlequin’ of sorts.  I work in a porn shop, so I really had no interest in reading something I’m around all day.  However thanks to some “Facebook friends” I gave in.

First, if the entire book was about sex, most people would only have read a few pages and given up.  There is a story to it.  The main male character, Christian Grey, a very successful, charming, handsome man, had a very fucked up childhood.  The type of sex he has ever known was BDSM.  Besides the bondage portion of sex in the book, I really don’t know why it caused such an uproar in entertainment and news.  I want to say this the first book to ever bring up BDSM sex, but I’m not 100% sure.

Second, I have no idea how this book was ever published with as many grammatical errors it had.  I am certainly no editor, but obviously if EL can write a book-anyone can!

Third, I see what women like about these books.  Before I even got to the “sex portion” I was already charmed by Christian Grey.  His confidence and success would make any woman swoon.  Most women love a man like that.  From my view, I believe women love a man who is in charge and in control.  I think that because women have spent years trying to be equal to men in the workforce, and in a way women have lost a little of their femininity.  Women have become too aggressive and independent.  And to me they have forgotten how men are and were (to me) supposed to be.  So they see this strong and confident character and they’re drawn to that.  But one thing I bet women won’t notice is how men (in real life) have turned into softer, emotional creatures.  It’s as if more men have picked up the emotions that women used to and some do still have.  So therefore because women fought to be equal they lost what they want and need in a male partner.  Also they’re more concerned about their own needs and forget how to take care of a man.  Ever since these books have been out I have gotten a lot of couples coming in to my store asking about bondage type products.  I feel that because it has been in national news and an entertainment trend, women are now open to try these type of sex acts.  If 50 Shades of Grey never became popular then women would never have paid attention to that type of lifestyle.  Women value other people’s opinions before their man in their life.  And as women read this book it got them excited to try it.  I can almost assure you that if a man brings up the idea to try new sex acts to his gf/wife she would find him disgusting for wanting to do such things.  Or she would think that he is doing such acts with another person, which would lead to an even bigger issue with the relationship.

Finally, my first confession: I enjoyed the book series.  If you have not read 50 Shades Darker, or 50 Shades Freed, you really should so you can understand the entire story.