Ahhh delightful anal sex! Ladies, I know your thoughts on it. Hell no, right? “He must be gay if he wants to put it in my ass. That’s an exit only. It will hurt too much.” I’ve heard every possible reason as to why women won’t try it. Hell, I used to be that woman! Guys, you should know that all women don’t like it. Women are not like the porn performers that you watch on your favorite free tube sites. If your woman refuses to do it, drop it and move on.
Personally, I enjoy anal sex. You would too if you practiced and relaxed a little bit. For those who are open and curious to try it, this is my honest and true how-to guide.
Start small. Use a small vibrator or anal plug. If that’s too much to start with, then you can always start with a finger. If your man is going down on you, let him use how wet you are to play around that area. More than likely one finger will feel like nothing and you’ll be ready to start using a toy.
I strongly suggest using a toy before letting your man go to town. With a toy you’re letting your body get comfortable with a object in a “foreign” area. But hey, if you want your man to try with his penis that is your choice as well.
Lubricant! Use it! I don’t care how wet you get. For the first few times you will need as much lubricant as possible. For more information about lubes just click here.
To start you should take a shower or bath. Relax. Start slow. There’s no need to rush the process. Most women will rush it and end up hating it and never trying it again. I’ve had numerous women come to my store and tell me their horror stories. That’s why I also suggest to them buying Anal-ease. It is a de-sensitizer and will basically make that area numb. I, however, find it pointless to numb an area that’s so pleasurable. But it’s good to use if you’re really stressed out about the pain of it.
If you’re uncomfortable doing it by yourself, have your man use the toy on you. Speak up. If it’s too much at first, stop, breathe, and keep going. Once you’re able to fit it all in, leave it there for a few minutes. Then you should try to pull it out and put it back in. Doing this will help you get used to the pressure. What I’ve also found to help is using a vibrator or bullet on your clit. Or just rub it. We all know how pleasurable clitoral stimulation is. The two combined will help you relax and possibly orgasm before you know it.
See it’s not that bad, right? Remove the toy and let your man enter you. It will probably be a different feeling, depending on the size of the toy you used and the size of your man. Remind him to go slow. Use more lubricant. You’re the one in control of this! If it feels fine and you’re not in pain then let him continue how he normally would. I can’t stress enough that you need to be vocal during this. If you’re in too much pain or it’s altogether too much, take a break. Try it another day.
The more you practice the more you will enjoy it, and learn to love it. You can move on to bigger and better toys. Bigger plugs, vibrating plugs, who knows, even double penetration.
I asked someone dear to me to give a male’s point of view. Below is his response:
“Communicate. Lots of lube. And let her control the speed-even if it means standing utterly still for a while (feels almost impossible for the man…the drive to just go crazy is intense, but probably not beneficial in the beginning.) Ask her ahead of time to maybe give you some pre-arranged signal for when she is comfortable enough for you to do what you want. Or have her just tell you.”
Don’t forget to have fun. It’s sex, and sex is great! Remember to be safe if you’re not in a monogamous relationship. After you’ve succeeded in your first rear entry encounter, give yourself a pat on the back. Then go take a shower!
Comments are always appreciated!