Fifty Shades of Grey (Film)

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Happy Valentine’s Day to you all!  I hope you were all able to enjoy this love filled day.  I’ve had a pretty amazing day myself.  I have just returned home after seeing Fifty Shades of Grey at my local AMC theater.  I haven’t written a blog post in a while.  I suppose I’ve been lazy and resorting to Tumblr for any text posts.

I would like to start this with saying that I thoroughly enjoyed all three installments of the Fifty Shades of Grey novels.  When they were released I wasted no time in getting them and I spent a day and a half reading through the trilogy.  I can’t believe it has been four years since the books have been out.  Which leads us to today.  Opening weekend of the movie.

I have heard and read all the criticism there is around this book.  Everyone has an opinion.  What is an absolute fact, it’s just a story.  One hundred percent fiction.  What you choose to take from the book is clearly based on your own connection with the book.   If you want to believe this book is glamorizing abusive relationships, that is completely your opinion.  If you think it is a great love story, that is also your opinion.  Two people can look at the same piece of artwork and have completely different thoughts on what it means, and what it portrays.  The only person who knows for sure what the art is, is the artist.

With that being said, I really enjoyed the movie.  I think the movie portrayal nailed it right on the head of the characteristics of each person in the book.  You feel the awkwardness.  You feel the tension.  You feel the pain with each cracking sound of the leather belt that hits her skin.

There was one scene in particular the movie could have explained more.  In the book as Ana is getting dressed to go with Christian to his parents house for dinner, she can not find her panties.  In the movie you see her look around a dark room, notices a new dress laid out for her.  She walks downstairs and he makes a comment asking her if she is sure she has everything.  I might have been the only one in the audience to chuckle at that.  Thanks to reading the book first!

I enjoyed the humor in the movie.  Which may be odd to some because of the sexual theme of the story line.  I feel that if you haven’t read all three books then you will never understand the complete picture of the story.  There’s more to this than just sex.  More to it than just getting tied up and spanked or being flogged.  It really is a love story.  That is what I personally take from the trilogy and from the movie.

Then ending of the film is a cliff hanger.  I don’t want to spoil it too much for those who have not seen it yet.  It wasn’t shocking to me that there would be a cliff hanger.  There are three books!!  I personally was just shocked as to what point it had ended.  I am definitely ready to see the sequel.  I have not heard nor read anything about a release date or if it has even started production yet.

One last thing I would like to add, please don’t go see this with a bunch of your girlfriends and then be the ones to giggle in the audience every time someone says the word, fuck.  It is truly fucking annoying.  🙂

Thank you for taking the time to read this.  If you have any questions or would like to discuss your thoughts on the books or movie, please feel free to leave a comment below or you can find me on Twitter & Tumblr.

XOXO

Twitter: @officialJ
Tumblr: baby-sweetwood

You’re putting it where??!

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Ahhh delightful anal sex!  Ladies, I know your thoughts on it.  Hell no, right?  “He must be gay if he wants to put it in my ass.  That’s an exit only.  It will hurt too much.”  I’ve heard every possible reason as to why women won’t try it.  Hell, I used to be that woman!  Guys, you should know that all women don’t like it.  Women are not like the porn performers that you watch on your favorite free tube sites.  If your woman refuses to do it, drop it and move on.  

Personally, I enjoy anal sex.  You would too if you practiced and relaxed a little bit.  For those who are open and curious to try it, this is my honest and true how-to guide. 

Start small.  Use a small vibrator or anal plug.  If that’s too much to start with, then you can always start with a finger.  If your man is going down on you, let him use how wet you are to play around that area.  More than likely one finger will feel like nothing and you’ll be ready to start using a toy.  

I strongly suggest using a toy before letting your man go to town.  With a toy you’re letting your body get comfortable with a object in a “foreign” area.  But hey, if you want your man to try with his penis that is your choice as well.  

Lubricant!  Use it!  I don’t care how wet you get.  For the first few times you will need as much lubricant as possible.  For more information about lubes just click here

To start you should take a shower or bath.  Relax.  Start slow.  There’s no need to rush the process.  Most women will rush it and end up hating it and never trying it again.  I’ve had numerous women come to my store and tell me their horror stories.  That’s why I also suggest to them buying Anal-ease.  It is a de-sensitizer and will basically make that area numb.  I, however, find it pointless to numb an area that’s so pleasurable.  But it’s good to use if you’re really stressed out about the pain of it.  

If you’re uncomfortable doing it by yourself, have your man use the toy on you.  Speak up.  If it’s too much at first, stop, breathe, and keep going.  Once you’re able to fit it all in, leave it there for a few minutes.  Then you should try to pull it out and put it back in.  Doing this will help you get used to the pressure.  What I’ve also found to help is using a vibrator or bullet on your clit.  Or just rub it.  We all know how pleasurable clitoral stimulation is.  The two combined will help you relax and possibly orgasm before you know it.  

See it’s not that bad, right?  Remove the toy and let your man enter you.  It will probably be a different feeling, depending on the size of the toy you used and the size of your man.  Remind him to go slow.  Use more lubricant.  You’re the one in control of this!  If it feels fine and you’re not in pain then let him continue how he normally would.  I can’t stress enough that you need to be vocal during this.  If you’re in too much pain or it’s altogether too much, take a break.  Try it another day.  

The more you practice the more you will enjoy it, and learn to love it.  You can move on to bigger and better toys.  Bigger plugs, vibrating plugs, who knows, even double penetration.  

 

I asked someone dear to me to give a male’s point of view. Below is his response: 

“Communicate.  Lots of lube.  And let her control the speed-even if it means standing utterly still for a while (feels almost impossible for the man…the drive to just go crazy is intense, but probably not beneficial in the beginning.)  Ask her ahead of time to maybe give you some pre-arranged signal for when she is comfortable enough for you to do what you want.  Or have her just tell you.”

 

Don’t forget to have fun.  It’s sex, and sex is great!  Remember to be safe if you’re not in a monogamous relationship.  After you’ve succeeded in your first rear entry encounter, give yourself a pat on the back.  Then go take a shower! 

 

XOXO

Comments are always appreciated!

Twitter: @officialJ 

 

International Clitoris Awareness Week

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May 6th-12th is International Clitoris Awareness Week!  This is the first time I’ve ever heard about it.  I think it’s a wonderful thing what Clitoraid does.  It’s such a shame what some women go through. 

Perfect timing considering it’s Masturbation Month!  Pay attention to the clit!  It has 8,000 nerve endings-that’s 3,000 more than a penis!  Guys, if you are unaware of how important the clit is, you need to work on that.  Clitoral stimulation through sex is amazing and will intensify a woman’s orgasm.  So while giving her oral, do not forget the clit!  Lick it, suck it, rub it, adore it!  While having sex, watch her rub it, or reach down and rub it for her.  

I was listening to XM radio last Friday and there was a discussion about it.  Men and women called in giving their thoughts about it and fellas, women are disappointed with you!  90% of the time during oral you are so focused on her pussy you do not wiggle your tongue up just a little further and lick her clit.  I can’t blame guys only.  Women you need to be more verbal and let a man know if he is not doing something right.  He would tell you if you’re head game was bad, right?  So when he’s down on you, relax.  As he’s doing his “moves” grab his head gently, or aggressively if you’re into that, and guide him where you want his tongue to go.  Talk to him through moans.  “Left..mmm.. Up.. to the right a little..mmm fuck.. that’s the fucking spot don’t fucking stop!”  The more reaction he gets from you, the more he knows to continue in certain spots.  If for some reason after that he still ignores it, I say do it yourself.  Rub it while he’s giving you oral, or feel free to keep a bullet or a toy pressed against your clit. 

 

Keep those orgasms coming! 

 

 

-xoxo-
Twitter: @officialJ