“This type of stuff”




I’ve been pondering the sentence “this type of stuff” all day.  I had an older gentleman today buy a few toys.  He was asking what batteries each toy took and so on, and told me that his girlfriend is new to “this type of stuff”.  I’ve heard this several times in the past seven years I’ve been at the store.  I can’t help to wonder why women are so new to purchasing and using toys.  When I hear that phrase it becomes frustrating, because it seems people are too sheltered.  

Now what is this type of stuff they’re referring to?  I can not answer that.  Is it the environment?  The content?  Do they feel they will be judge by those in the store?  To me, it’s like going to a department store.  You’re there for a purpose, and hopefully that purpose is pleasure.  In my opinion, if you’re having sex, you should not be embarrassed by objects at a adult bookstore.  Sex is natural.  Sex is a part of life.  So what is wrong with talking about it, and or, being around it?  When shopping at a sex shop, no one is forcing you to purchase anything you are not wanting to purchase.  I’ve been asking around and most people agree with me.  I did have one opinion that made sense to me.  Even though a couple may be sexually active, they may not have ever used toys or watched porn while in the act.  So therefore they would be nervous/intimidated to walk into a sex shop.

Personally, I’ll never forget my first trip to a adult bookstore.  I remember the first toy I bought.  I was 18.  My friends and I were finally at the age to where we were allowed to go to porn shops.  Most of us were already sexually active, so we were excited to see what was out there.  It was pretty intimidating at first.  Besides getting weird looks from the men that were browsing the store, seeing all the novelties was amusing to us.  I remember all I could think about was what the hell to buy.  I didn’t know the difference between any of the toys at the time.  I thought they all did the same thing.  The guy behind the counter was older and not that friendly looking, so I didn’t dare approach him for any help.  I was looking at the vibrators and I seen a cute straight pink one.  It was $17.99 and being a broke college kid at the time, it was in the perfect price range for me.  I was the only one out of my group of friends to buy something.  And I was ridiculed of it.  Which even back then, I didn’t know why it was such a big deal to them.  I they weren’t looking to buy anything, I couldn’t figure out why we even had stopped there then. I brought it up to the register.  The clerk asked if I needed batteries, and I remember blushing because my friends were laughing when he said that.  I politely said no, handed him the cash, and I was on my way.  That was my first experience with buying and using a toy.  I had never found it to be odd, or wrong.  If anything I think it’s great for women to keep at least one in her house. 

In this day and age I would think people would be more open sexually and not think of adult bookstores as a taboo or a dirty book store.  Like I’ve said in a previous post, it is a fun environment.  No intimidation or judgement.  The people who work at these stores now are very friendly and willing to help you out if needed.  And if you’re that nervous, I suggest browsing the internet and checking things out before you head out to your local sex shop.  That way you know what to expect when you walk in.  Become familiar with it and have fun with it!  


Thank you for reading. Comments are always appreciated!
You can reach me on Twitter @officialJ 🙂  


Dirty Looks


Most of you who know me, know that I’ve been working at a porn shop for over seven years.  Doesn’t seem like a long time but then again it feels like twenty years.  I love my job.  Of course there are stressful days at times.  Not everyday can be perfect!  

One thing that really “grinds my gears” would be when certain couples come in the store.  I like to call them the “newbies.”  These are the newest forms of relationships.  Be it a one-night stand couple, or a couple that has been together for no longer than a year.  These younger couples are the ones that typically the male brings them to the store to try and open up their woman more sexually.  Which I absolutely encourage!  Sex is a necessity for any relationship.  It’s fun and healthy.  90% of my customers are men.  They often come to the store and ask my advice as to what toy, or lubricant, etc, they should get for their girlfriend.  I always say, “it’s up to her, not me. Every woman is different.”  That’s a completely true statement.  I could try and sell you a rabbit, but if she’s never used a toy before it might seem intimidating at first.  So I always tell them to bring their girlfriends in and let them look around and watch them.  See what she pays attention to more.  See what one she keeps going back to.  Then I get a typical response, “she’s scared to come to a store like this.”  A store like what?  I’ll leave that for another post.  

Finally you bring your girl of the week or month in the store.  I greet you both and say if there’s anything you need help finding of if you have any questions, please feel free to ask.  Then I leave you both to it.  Then come the stares.  The dirty looks.  Not from the man, but from the woman.  She stares at me and gives me dirty looks.  I have had more women drag their men out of the store and seriously start arguments in front of me at the store.  I can only assume that most women think that it’s only men that work at adult book stores.  Most women also feel threatened when another woman is around and especially in a shop that is all about sex.  Ladies, I do not want your man.  I am all set in that department.  Even if I was that type of woman to just throw myself at a man who has a girl, I would never try and hook up with someone who is one of my customers.  I also want to add that I say it’s younger relationships (young love), because in a mature relationship, a woman is more comfortable in knowing that no other woman would try and come at her man.

So the men are being dragged out of the store.  She want’s to leave, so you have to follow her, right?  Not in every case I’ve seen.  I have heard men tell their women to “go sit in the damn car” and wait.  That always makes me laugh.  Only if it’s expressed a certain way.  I believe if you’re going to curse a man out, he has every right to treat you the same way in return.  The other men that do leave with their women always look so frustrated.  Ladies you have to understand that your man is trying to help you.  To help you both.  Spice things up.  Open up your mind to bigger ideas.  When you go to sex shops do not be threatened by whoever’s behind the counter.  Also do not be intimidated by the advice and experience the worker has.  

The ladies that do stay around and do ask for advice always leave happy.  I’ve helped I can probably say at least a thousand, or damn near close to, find the perfect toy, massage oil, lingerie, or movie.  

That’s it. That is my job, to help you.  I am not trying to “show off” in front of your man.  I may have more experience and knowledge on certain things.  That doesn’t make me a bad person.  I have the up-most respect for you and your man when you walk through the front door.  

Finally to end this rant of sorts, I still do encourage men to bring their women to sex shops.  Men, if you have already been to the store maybe it might be a good idea to let your girl know that you’ve checked out the place and you feel that she will be comfortable there and you will both enjoy shopping together.  Surprisingly a lot a women have never stepped foot in a sex shop.  Warm them up to the idea and bring them in.  Whoever is there will always be willing to help you out, or let you browse without being hovered over.  



And as always, comments are always appreciated! -xoxo- 

Unnecessary Inches


Recently a man came into my store and was asking for all sorts of products.  Unfortunately we didn’t have anything he was looking for so he had stated he would just have to go to Home Depot for them…(50 Shades much?)  Then he tells me the size of a cock ring he is looking for, 2″ and 1/4.  We did not have that in stock either, no strike that, we Never have any in that size!

He then says, “I know I’m larger than the average male, it’s so hard finding the right size.”  My first thought was wow good for you buddy!  Then my second thought was, why does he feel the need to “brag” about his hmmm thickness I should say.  My third thought was, why is he even sharing details like this with a stranger.  Is it because he is “bragging” or is he really that large.  Then I had another thought, if this man is the size he claims to be then I feel sorry for the woman who is performing oral on him, (her jaw must be hurting by the end!)

I confess, I measured my mouth when it was wide open and it is 1″ and 3/4, which would mean “Mr Horsecock” would not even be suitable for me!  Maybe I have a small mouth.  I would ask other women how wide their mouth opens to, but I’m pretty sure I would get a look like “what the fuck is wrong with her!”

Which brings me to my next topic.  Why do women want men with large penises?  It’s a known fact that the vaginal depth is 4-6 inches.  As a woman becomes more aroused, she can expand maybe up to another two inches.  So if you’re looking for men to be 10″ or bigger what in the world are you going to do with all of those unnecessary inches?  Is it just to be able to claim that your man is extremely large?  Because it’s a fact that there is no way you’re fitting a whole 10 incher inside you vaginally.

Finally, women should never judge a man based on size.  You can get plenty of pleasure with what a man has, and if you can not, then you should look into trying different positions and adding toys into the mix.




Questions & comments are always welcomed!

Twitter: @officialJ